(a question on health insurance) and a personal sharing

Hi,

I thought to ask something here and also to share some things...

The „practical“ questions are: Do you pay a health insurance? Is it obligatory in your country?

Here in Slovakia it is. I feel like ignoring it (I dont go to a doctor and the last time I was there was when I was on a high school and needed sick bays, hehe.) However, for some reasons I feel frightened to ignore it...

Since last year (April) to Feb 29 I was officially employed as an administration worker in a language school. I didnt work there practically.
Last year I started working there and it just wasnt right, I think you understand... and also the employer could see I didnt feel good there. So we agreed that I would officially be their employee – they got some financial bonus for me, and they payed those official charges, like health insurance. They didnt need the administrator so much.
Now they have found somebody else for the position.

I could go to the labour office in 7 days (from Feb 29) so that the government would pay health insurance for me. I havent got registered. I feel disorientated in this world. And I had a PMDD...
And I haven´t told my mom and my family about it.
I asked my friends (they are on the spiritual path) and they told me they pay their health insurance. And my friends daughter even had a trouble with the insurance company for not paying and is paying a debt and a fine now.

I dont want my mom to pay health insurance for me. I dont want to go to the labour office either.

If I told my family about this, my mom would pay the insurance. They would be scared of executors.
At the same time I feel a guilt towards my mom for not telling her anything. I havent told her even that I am no longer in the old "job".

I wonder what should I do now.

I need to find a job in some other country. Somewhere in nature, it must be peaceful, but I have no idea what it should be yet...

But what to do with this health insurance thing?

And I am going through a lot now and it causes me to feel so distressed and unbalanced. My poor adrenals and nervous system and spleen... Sometimes I get a nauea and heart palpitations.
I am also feeling through quite a lot of sadness. And attacks and opression. And so much parasites and entities.

I will finish now.(Sitting here in front of comp makes me feel unwell.)

I have a strong faith everything will somehow be all right and well.

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Thanks for sharing Naty and Open. The constant exploration of the systems we are surrounded by provides many growth opportunities for me. Sometimes those moments appear to see or feel the synchronicity for me as I too often find density to dance with in systems that a part of my life and my family. I struggle to overcome my mind wanting a certain outcome. Somedays I feel I have accomplished this while others days there is still something to unfold into. As Open talked about above what is this telling me is a harder question to answer than shall I pay my health insurance. Sometimes I dance with this by asking myself what if I have no attachment to the end result? No matter which action I take will continue to lead me down my path to uncover or explore new ways to connect deeper to myself. The fight for me pops up at times when some manner shape or form of FEAR is appearing. Being brave and courageous to allow myself to explore it and see how the flow is guiding me requires the quiet and the connection. When I connect to the realization somehow I got out of my flow and what pulled me over to that side to explore? For me, this can bring me to my knees at times and it can be so painful to feel through this rather than just go numb. Feeling through my pain creates a beautiful bridge to a place I now know I can't get to if I bypass, try to think it through or just go numb. I have been moving through another system myself and struggling as I don't have the knoweldge to navigate it on my own. It has been difficult to watch and see how the resources will appear as I would like to just get it done and put it away. That is not what is happening so I am asking for support to help naviagte this and surrendering.

As I share today I am in gratitude for all the support here and honor the gifts we receive from the seasonal change of spring and how mother earth is supporting us to shift and open in this very moment. namaste

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Thank you both Ben and Open, your responses are resonant and helpful.

Ben, beautifully said.

The situation seems complicated and tempting me to be very much in the head, and I didn´t mention some things in my post. Anyway, I think it only seems complicated, and I should just be in my heart.

Namaste

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Great advice Eddie. *OK*

It's always a bit of a challenge when balanced between the natural flow and the system.

Always but always in these situations, rather than focusing on the end outcome (in this case getting health insurance or not), I believe it helps most of all to ask: "what is it telling me?"

And usually it's telling you about some kind of tightness within the bodymind.

When I read what people write, or hear what they say, often words will 'spike' in the field, which provide an indication of what the true - underlying - exploration is really all about.

What jumps out here Naty, is the sense of responsibility - obligation even - for telling your mum about what choices you feel to make. Your path is your path, and no one else's. It's about you taking sovereignty for your own life. Do you really need to share with her all the details of your life? Would she likely understand a choice that comes from the spirit, and not the system?

How does it feel to do that? Are you afraid of the freedom from her and perhaps the system? The invitation is to explore deeply into any tightness the situation might cause. Work to unwind it and let go.

Look for a new aspect of beingness to come through - self empowerment perhaps? Then let this sense of beingness make the choice for you. It will become much more obvious.

Wishing you well

Open

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This is not an easy decision you face. The only thing I can offer is to get out of your head and into your heart space. Negative emotions are from the mind and not the heart. Your heart knows what to do! You have to quiet your mind to hear it which is sometimes very difficult. The whole universe and all peace is inside your heart you just have to calm yourself enough to see it. Much Love to you from the other side of the world!!! Eddie