Aren't karmic cartoons spooky, ha? :) Boo! lol But such pain, such pain to sink into and rest in, also when totally blinded. Drama, action, horror, whatever you like, for free, and not just with 3D glasses, but rather the direct full-blown experience offered, for free, to ourselves, from ourselves. Anyway... There is a karmic history with humanity. There is cosmic karma, from the beginning of creation (fragmentation of the whole) and there are many processes that are mirrored in the events that followed in realities that were built to resolve it. All the history of the whole universe. One of them is what happened on earth. That was the first one for me to deal with, the loss of the unborn child (in this lifetime) as a reflection of one of the karmic bugs. At some point it doesn't matter why it happened and why the darkness and disconnection was formed to protect from pain and trauma. The pain itself, or the experience matter only and only because of the fact that going into the pain is the only way to not cause pain to others! Therefore, the question is why go in? We've been hunting for our own peace and happiness for a long time. Now there is no such worry anymore. But there is a great anxiety and some effort still, because of the knowing of not being yet and the awareness of the damage it does. This is the driving force and one of the keys to resolving karma, in my technical observation of the process. It might help those who experience and process karma while still transfiguring. It will not be resolved until G3 is passed through. So again, RELAX, if you can, and breathe. It is the only thing that helps anyway. Plus, it will also be beneficial for everybody around. They will see and it will show them example that it is ok and might want to try. But when I am all dramatic, it does not invite to participate at all. Deep inside we just want to be and play out of that, freely. Not to film and show others our drama movies. Before G4 it was like worrying about myself a lot, and about the pain I felt and boohoooing about it, a lot. All the time. Seeing nobody but my fake self and expecting others to understand and contain me. But now it is a maturity moment, when self-absorbed perception must move aside and the truth sinks in right away, together with the experiential 'entertainment' without popcorn hhh and the immediate change in behaviours, perceptions and realities around it. The debugging is actually done by stopping pulling the blanket to ME and realising that everybody around reflects my own cartoon to me and that they and the Mirrorland hold the key to the truth about me (this is how it looks during Transfiguration, because there is an obvious ME there). Later it is just going back to presence, again, and again, and again, through the invisible, until it is seen. If I want to find it out, I must start watching all of that very carefully and agree to pain with no conditions or doubts or expectations or whatever. Boring old thing... It's just agreeing that it will hurt like hell and relax into this knowing. Because... Love is the driving force of G4 (for me at least), not self-interest. It is great news in comparison to other 3 gateways and a great relative ease too. So it is worth wandering in horror through the blind hellish corridors of transfiguration ;) The second important thing that I found is the whole reflection of motherhood and childbirth. 1. I felt such love when I was pregnant. Love I did not know before. But it was choice-less. Love for children is choice-less and it hits the initial karma of female aspect being so soft that it almost disappears and does not participate at all. It doesn't make choices, it doesn't choose to love, be loved, create... It does not create. The little incapable Frankenstein then has to grow a pair, stop scaring everybody around to prevent and reject love :) (like birth-control pills for instance and all our behaviours and cartoons too)... a hint... Choicelessness of love is reflected also in getting pregnant and what it means. That women had no conscious choice - if you make love, you get pregnant. Disempowering. 2. A choice to love is choosing to love someone or something foreign as if he/she would be your child and learning to love things that cause pain (seemingly). Unconditional love for life, for people, and then, through the mirrors it all locks itself back into itself. Love is the choice that is made on every step of the karmic stage. Love or separation? Love demands sacrifice. Sacrifice of the cartoons to a different reality, to any reality of choice. 3. This is why I now see childbirth as the final signal of having the right to be a mother, to offer love to another soul, which is possible only after attaining constant presence and alignment of the bodymind. If I am whole and love life with my whole being with no conditions at all, if I am able to create every moment anew, then I can afford to bring life into the reality I create. So unconsciousness of society about its condition and living out distortions are manifested to me as an immense irresponsibility. It also was reflected in my pain for my mothers inability to love me as a child and teach me live from love (which is being or presence itself to me). We see it all around. "I want a child" or "We want a child" - is it a valid motivation? Or I want sex because I want to revel in physical pleasure or even love, if you wish, but I will deny the possible outcome. The 'mirror' shows this blind spot. I want chocolate, I want Mersedes. Can I? Am I capable? What are the possible consequences of my choice right now? And if I don't mind giving birth, then what do I have to offer as a mother? for some it is enough to offer a set up for the souls to come in and play out their distortions. To me, love is the only interesting thing, always was. So the question here is am I free when I make my choices? When I behave the way I behave? React the way I react? If I am free, then what kind of mother experience I am yearning for? Everybody has a path of its own. Karmic stuff helps refine all this and then nailed with realignment, the choice disappears because we just know we can trust ourselves 100%. And the last one - if I cannot experience my pain in such way that it will not shatter others, then I am better find ways to deal with it in a less dramatic way. So learning to contain the pain without turning it into a theatrical success in an attempt to get the whole of the audience involved, jumping out of their sits and get unstable like me, it might be very helpful to spare our loved ones the spilling of our crap and finding better ways. It is not walking on eggshells and preventing others from working their stuff, but it is respecting the space of others and stop confusing between "me" and "them". The prize is: you grow a pair and learn to take a stone in a ball like Daniel Craig's James Bond. Entities are really a gift here, so thanks to the monsters for the service. After setting them free from at least my cartoon. You know, those who suck our energy are not any less victim of ours than us to them. We are bound together and it is up to me only whether I hold an entity a prisoner to prevent myself from being present, creating pain and turmoil in and around me... or not. Ok. There is so much, but this is all to be said hhh Have fun there, and-eh... it is a kind of computer game, with levels and deaths and all that stuff. Supposed to be kinda intense hhh This series really reflect a lot to me about karma and its connection to transfigurational stuff (reflections in the current lifetime). Needless to say it is pretty dark :) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZYAQSlIhM4