Hi everyone,

I’m very intrigued by this Sirius topic that has received a lot of attention here lately. And I’m trying to figure out whether this has something to do with me as well. Unlike some of you, I don’t have any memories of a Sirian existence, but I have a lot of strange other pieces that maybe echo a past Sirian life. Maybe you can help me connect the dots if I reveal them here.

*During my awakening, about 2 years ago, I had a powerful vision of the goddess Isis. She surged through me from bortom to top and had me say over and over “I am the goddess Isis, and Bennu is my son!” Before this I didn’t even know who Isis was, except by name. So naturally I googled her and her story, and one thing I found was that she was perceived to be the soul of the star Sirius by the ancient Egyptians.

*A few weeks later, I had a session with a psychic healer, working through a personal life theme. Betrayal and abandonment. The session took us back a few life times where the theme was prevalent and at the end we weren’t on Earth any more but on a different planet and she saw me as an “aspect of Isis” and asked me if Isis’s story involved betrayal somehow, and of course I knew it did, as I had recently read about her. The psychic’s conclusion was that this particular theme originated all the way back there, but that’s all she could say at the time. She couldn’t comprehend it any further.

*Many years ago, long before I knew anything about awakenings or 5d shifts, a good friend of mine had a psychotic episode in which she completely “lost her mind” and had to be admitted. But here is the piece that sticks with me to this day. Before the actual psychosis, which had to do with repressed memories from a previous traumatic event, she began having spiritual experiences. And she was telling me all kinds of things, about visions she had, voices that were speaking to her, symbolism and synchronicities. But more clearly than anything, I remember the car that came to take her to the hospital and the company name written in big letters. A name that made my friend laugh hysterically with recognition when she saw it and uttered it, and therefore caught my attention to the point that I would never forget it - SIRIUS.

*Ever since the 90’s, and the introduction of mobile phones and the internet, I have had a very strong resistance to technology. Like a premonition that this development is potentially negative and even dangerous. And now I can see how it begins to “own” people. How they think they’re evolving with every new gadget and update, but in fact they are losing themselves and their sovereignty more and more. Spun and trapped into a dehumanising “wwweb” of control and programming. (No pun intended.)

*Even though I have a strong connection with the Divine inside me, at the same time I have a feeling of having lost trust in it. Of having been separated from it in a brutal way, perhaps against my will. I can see and feel a chord that has been severed. And after exploring and unwinding my childhood issues involving this theme, I still see the severed chord and the feeling with it that runs deeper and beyond this lifetime. It’s the feeling of a marionette, dependent on the thread to its master, that suddenly gets cut off and just crumbles to the floor, completely disempowered.

This is also connected to a lifelong issue of having trouble manifesting. I’m a highly creative individual. I can create infinitely inside my being, words, music, projects, ideas, all of which could so easily be materialised in the outer world. BUT, it just doesn’t happen, because at the end of each inner creation, I find myself standing at a big deep dark divide. I’m on one side of it, and I can see the other side clearly, but I can’t reach it, not of my own accord. The connection, the bridge, is not visible to me. And therefore my creation either falls down the great divide and disappears or remains inside me, sadly, unmanifested.

As I’m writing this, I’m actually making quite a big realisation. I suddenly understand why I have so diligently pursued the performing arts in my life, as opposed to the creative arts, which is where my true soul essence actually lies. In the performing arts, I only needed to manifest someone else’s creation, not my own. I also understand now all the obstacles down this path. The difficulties, the chain of physical injuries, that eventually forced me in a different direction. A little while ago my guides explained to me that the physical injuries were necessary to divert my course, that this wasn’t the right path for me. I suddenly just realised why...

Thank you for providing me with the space to write this and thank you for reading, whoever does. If you have any thoughts on the Sirius puzzle, please share them with me.

With love,

Anastasia