Hi Marije - great to have you connect - your energy is most welcome, and somehow it feels like you're here.

Ah yes, the pain body, a pretty much perfect expression of it in your words. I'm sure many would recognise.

And you know well how to get into that and process it. To keep feeling the contracting touch points inside. Thread by thread it starts to pull apart - but in these moments it's going to be challenging, because those anchoring threads reflect out into life, into our relationships for example. And whereas before we accepted blind and unconscious actions - a co-dependency between states in people - now we know that such unconsciousness is not acceptable to the unfusing soul we can feel. Hence the challenge and discomfort.

But the only way out is through! Through the challenges, through the inquiry, through the cauldron. Whatever choice I'm resisting, work to take that direction anyway and then work into what comes up. What often helps is this...

To realise that every distortion is a distortion of truth. Meaning distorted behaviour is a distortion of one of the rays of expression. So for example slipping into self judgment would be a distortion of the inquiring ray 3 - "what is real right now?" "what am I being invited to do?" Or, "where is the right boundary for my expression?"

The problem here is the ego looking for a simple answer - "do this". And then ties itself in knots because the answer doesn't come! Instead, it's about allowing the inquiry. Allowing the question to create of it's own accord. Most essentially, in any given tightness in the moment, is to recognise the tightness is where you need to be, but then immediately to work to soften and open out through it. This creates the space for an authentic ray of the soul to emerge. You find yourself already starting to express. Natural choices then create from the expression.

Yes, this will bush buttons in the people around you who want and need an expected behaviour from you. At some point though, you'll come to the realisation that carrying this weight just isn't worth it. It's not worth it for you or them. When you decide to set it down, then recognising the tightness and immediately unwinding through to reveal right action becomes a whole lot easier.

Open