Love those Maori Hakas, so powerful and intensely uplifting. I have to remember these when I get myself in the dumps. This is all very meaningful to me. I believe one of my karmic lessons is to learn to let go of neediness of others and attachments. But what I feel beyond that is that would be the first step to becoming effective in teamwork without losing myself. I feel passionate about the OH work and feel a kinship with many here, unlike anything I've experienced before. Putting need for validation and being the hero aside, I feel strongly to be a part of this incredible work. But definitely still much work to be done to find my true self, and get to a place where I feel I could be reliable and make truly meaningful contributions without ego engagement. I want to be someone that others can trust, but must firstly be able to trust myself. But the determination is growing, and with all the ongoing support and assurances that I can do it (WE can do it), I'm really starting to believe I can. The doubts are getting weaker, the resolve stronger. Though I can't be of much help now, I truly believe that I do have gifts to contribute and feel highly motivated to unravel them. The assurance that there's no wrong answer and that even the upper echelons of the OH group of facilitators and leader are learning as they go, that softens that typical conditioned belief that I must have all the answers be perfect be the best. To let go of the fear of failing or embarrassing myself, man does that ever take such a load off! And the fear of conflict. Becoming more and more ok with constructive feedback. I was informed I believe, in an indirect way that I'm basically full of shit and asleep. At first it hurt and usual defensiveness popped up. But working it through and I realized, yes they are so right, and then the feeling of such gratitude that someone could see me so clearly and care enough to tell me the truth. And also the way the truth was delivered; in a way that would be the least hurtful. Very few people in my life have been able to or cared to tell me the truth, and I am so grateful to each and every one. Sure I have quite prickly defences and have blocked myself for a long time from it, but now I really see it will be the making of me. That's the very polishing I need, want and now less and less afraid to receive because I'm ready to become who I truly deeply am. I don't need to get anywhere before I can help. I'll give what I can and as I go, and I can give more and more as I get more polished. I want this. I trust you. I'm with you. How can I not? Your music choices alone are impeccable! May I be of service. barb🙏