Dear Open ,

I wanted to share a few experiences from the vipassana course I enrolled last few days. God only knows why I felt the need to go into it. But it seemed right at the time. Only on the first day it became clear to me I was not there to learn any technique about meditation but do energy work and uncover some aspects of myself.

I noticed how all the rules in the centre like when to wakeup and meditate, where to eat etc where closing me down all the time. And I could see many distortions including guru devotion, rigidity, dogmatism etc. I could feel how following my soul pull at many times where going against what was expected of me. There was a paternalistic controlling energy in the background supposedly for the benefit for all but where we had to hand over sovereignty. It was like the abusive parent who punishes his children but says " I'm doing this for your own benefit!" And the poor innocent child believes it!

The course requires us to hand over our valuables, phone etc before it begins which is a synchronicity of handing over sovereignty which only occored to me later.

I had some fear of authority which I had to confront internally but there was a breakthrough as I worked through it and on the 2nd day I wasnt afraid anymore and feeling incredibly free regardless of the environment. A feeling - I'm going with the torus no matter what! At this point I wanted to leave as I thought the work was complete. Or I was going to butt against the system and create chaos which I didn't want. But later I had some healthy conversation with the main teacher there who wanted me to continue and he adjusted all the rules just for my benefit. Quite an unlikely thing in such a course! Now, I had to be at the main meditation hall only 3 times for the day for group sitting and the rest of the day I had for myself. Things eased on after that. Meditating in the main hall with the group, I was picking all sorts of dense energies and I would later clear them in my room or in nature.

On the fourth day in the hall, when vipassana technique was being guided through the recording I was passing through some torturing hell and I looked at the clock behind which was exactly 4:44. I was feeling trapped there. In the evening I approached the main teacher once again for being relieved from the course. This time he showed an entirely different face. He became quite judgmental and said I'm doing a mistake and I had an unstable mind and so on. Back at my room I had a knowing , I was him in some past life , loosing sovereignty to religious practices , possibly patronising and misleading others. I cried a bucket full of tears asking for forgiveness and released whole lot of energy from my field.

Its quite clear intervention has taken over these spiritual teachings and practices. Or they may have been relevant many years ago but not anymore. They are being carried out exactly like it was done hundreds of years ago without innovation and evolution which in itself could be breeding ground for intervention. They talk about impermanence and change , yet the pracrice itself is rigid. I'm not sure what energies are behind this, possibly Ra and BS. I think its also quite possible that its helping thousands of people on where they are in the journey and I'm careful not to hold any judgment against them.

Back here after watching the video and going through the material here, I'm feeling deeply grateful that my soul had led me here in this lifetime. I recognise where this is comin from.

Namaste with love

Vimal 🙏