Hi Helen,

Heartfelt gratitude to you and Réka for your insightful and inspiring comments and for your invitation to join the etheric moon circle. When I first read your post a few days ago, I felt incredible tightness in my body. I could hear myself saying, "I'm definitely not the right sort to join this circle." So I've been feeling deeper into the layers of my conditioning around my initial "reaction" and felt to post a few comments today.

What I've come to realize is that I have feared the moon throughout my life, just as I have feared acceptance and surrender, the essence of the divine feminine. Interestingly enough, the moon is at the apex of my astrology birth chart in the 9th House of spiritual consciousness with the rest of the planets pointing upwards towards it. From a synchronicity viewpoint, I feel this as an invitation in this incarnation to soften into my over-energized warrior ray 1 energy and "give up" the constant need to struggle, fight, conquer, survive, and achieve. Ultimately, to feel the peace and harmony that arises from balancing the divine feminine and divine masculine energies.

In my coaching session with Kim this week (thank you, dear friend), I realize that I will never be a soft, surrendered, ray 2 kinda female -- although sometimes, as a woman, I find it to be a most appealing option! For, indeed, I have a strong ray 1 warrior energy. I'm feeling that the moon is inviting me now to become the aligned warrior: powerful, passionate, committed to positive change -- trusting in the flow of divine benevolence -- without the need to control or manipulate outcomes. That which serves all life.

Full moons typically find me excruciatingly anxious, hyper-vigilant, awake, unable to sleep, acutely feeling the collective pain and screams through the ether, including my own, desperate for release, desperate for transmutation. Yet I've been resisting the call to go within, express, surrender, and let go, preferring to escape and deny.

A few months back on social media, I put together a photo of a wolf howling at the moon with these words ascribed to "Patty" that go straight to my heart:

i howl to sooth
a thousand hearts broken
stop and listen to me
as I sing my song
for all who can't cry

It feels like the right time to make peace with the moon and the disowned parts of myself. Thanks for providing a vehicle to help me do that.

With love and appreciation,

x Catherine