Setting Intention, Divine Manifestation and Navigating the Quantum Soup
Humanity has discovered an important phenomenon about reality - that it is not fixed and solid, but more a moving flow of ever-adapting consciousness - the "Quantum Soup". And most importantly, that the observer affects reality by what you focus on. So it's become a common theme then to 'set intention' and 'manifest what you desire' to happen. Or else there's the view that some destined, synchronistic, event line - 'your destiny' - is supposed to land, but only by applying such focus. I think there's truth in these viewpoints, but not the whole truth. So how do you successfully navigate the inner landscape? How do you create authentic miracles and magic?...
The Quantum Soup of Reality
The first 'trick' is to fundamentally understand the nature of the universe and to explore how it works where you're at, within your life, right now. I put it to you, that life is a never-ending flow of consciousness, which temporarily takes form. Some of this form appears rigid or solid, sometimes immovable and permanent. Yet quantum science tells us it's all interconnected strings of energy, each with a 'shelf-life', that come and go, sinking back into the Quantum Soup of reality, before re-emerging once more to take on form.
What causes that form to take shape?
What science also postulates, is that you cannot separate the observer from the observed. So when something is observing, it focuses this Quantum Soup, and voila - dinner 'appears on your plate' (metaphorically speaking and a few billion years on from the big bang!).
Did the 'Creator' intend the Universe?
In this evolutionary process, streams of consciousness have formed, which we may call 'souls'. What is their purpose? By their actions, when you've delved deeply into the layers of reality, it's cleat they are here to have experience: to self-actualise an expression - a manifested form - of the One.
So far so good. But where does 'setting ones intention' figure in this flow?
I put it to you that the universe was not created by intention. That would presuppose a creator, and if there was such, where did it come from and who created it? (it's a fundamental question of reality, and therefore worth plenty of inner inquiry). We could consider the One as infinite potential - that which precedes all arising. This is such an important point to dwell on. I believe it's what many describe when they've truly had an enlightened experience - it feels like "there's no one here" (inside). But in this emptiness, there's an aliveness of infinite possibility... You feel like the creator.
You are 'the One', you know that, and there is just one moment of now, therefore the condition of emptiness that 'created' the universe through the bigbang is still there and never went away. At your core, you are that. So if you created the Universe without setting intention, why do you need set intention now? You'd only be creating something lesser, something smaller.
Yet I do believe there is a degree of truth in the concept of "setting your intention". But it's essential to establish exactly what you understand by that and how you apply yourself to it. If "setting your intention" means to be focussing on a specific goal to make it a reality, well then this simply creates identity that is in someway trying to manifest from a sense of lack. It may work for a while, but is sure to burn itself out at some point as identity becomes challenged by the Universe - the Universe tends to pull apart fixed anchors in time and space - You can't control the flow! But if "setting your intention" means to be attentive to the natural flow that wants to happen around you, and bringing your consciousness to bear in that, then I witness that becomes incredibly productive, aligned and harmonious. Perhaps then, we could substitute "setting one's intention" with "aligning with the natural directive".
Your unbridled Soul, is the miracle!
When you explore reality very deeply, inside your own experience of consciousness, I believe you come to the conclusion, that this infinite potential from where the Universe came, is still there, in the background of experience. It's what people call 'presence' and it's infinitely creative - crucially, without intention. It just happens. It's like the big bang - the big wave - is happening inside you all the time. But then something else profound and phenomenal happens: the big bang has spread out into multiplicity of form - the separation consciousness has condensed. And here's the miraculous part:
Within the Quantum Soup of Separation Consciousness are streams of energy pulling back to the source - these are 'souls' with the 'memory of the original condition of oneness'. Their yearning to be reunited with the source, is so compelling, so purposeful, that when allowed to, they create incredible miracles and magic as a way of being, through the natural interconnectivity of life - it's why signs and synchronicity lead naturally to magic and miracles. Your unbridled Soul is the very miracle!
So what's actually going on, in reality, is a divine paradox: you are being the infinite presence of the background, AND, SIMULTANEOUSLY, a streaming soul of experience flowing back to the source.
What can "I" do with this state? What can "I" create?
I believe many have touched this state at times and found it so incredible, so amazing, so magically profound, there often comes a wondering "What can 'I' do with it? What can 'I" create?" There's then a contemplation, and with that, a focusing. In the focusing, if the soul is not yet self-realised (realising of the One Self), it will attach to particular outcomes, feeling it needs such and such to define itself. I believe this mirrors the light getting lost in the darkness - the light getting stuck in the Quantum Soup so to speak.
Let's be clear, the One doesn't need anything, because it already has everything.
And the soul is there to animate the One - a living expression of it.
That's why a true visionary dreams, not of anything goes or what the ego might want, but actually sees future landing now. A true visionary is able to feel and pick up the flow of the Quantum Soup, as an integral part of their inner landscape. They're not intending anything. How can you see 'future landing now' if your mind is already full? How can you ride the wave of interconnectivity if you're trying to make it go a certain way? Also a true visionary is not afraid to call what they see, even though it might be against what the mainstream thinks. And they're not afraid to act on their visions. At heart, we're all true visionaries.
When there is no stuckness - of the soul - I observe there's an endless flow of manifestation, and without any intention, it creates experiences from which greater self-realisation can happen - you realise ever finer and higher aspects of the One. Furthermore, 'setting intention (for a specific goal)' actually cuts across this flow and diminishes it. It will create something from the Quantum Soup yes, but it will be a lesser meal, not necessarily one of the divine recipe.
It's like in my surfing analogy earlier, blowing up a ripple on some small pond somewhere and shouting "oh look, there's a synchronicity". Rather than riding a wave on the ocean where you become a part of constant streaming synchronicity.
The constant conscious question
Humanity has imagined and created quite a nightmare - in our current reality which tries to control outcomes - thus having a disastrous effect on the balance of our eco-system; it is bringing the planet to destruction (in terms of the 3D eco-systems). In my knowing, Gaia is already moving to 5D reality, within which, there is no intention to create something in particular...
Can you imagine for one moment, being Gaia, with all the weather systems and zillions of interrelating inhabitants, trying to control the outcome by 'setting her intention' on how each aspect is meant to happen? How do you possibly hold that map, which would serve all? That would be like trying to successfully manipulate a rubics cube with zillions of variables, rearranging it every moment, and getting it aligned every moment - I'd say that's why this 3D reality is now breaking down - some of the most brilliant minds in business, science and politics have tried to orchestrate it, and look at the general mess that's been created.
Perhaps then, from this, we can learn an invaluable lesson about authentic creating and where intention fits in? (or doesn't!).
In my knowing, in creating the 5D, Gaia has no intention, other than serving the interests of all life. I'd say she has a "constant conscious question". Something like this:
"How can a reality come together, which has the interests of all inhabitants of that (5D) level of consciousness, at heart?"
I've noticed personally, that if I hold the question, rather than an intention, then reality takes shape in the most exquisite of ways. All manner of situations and synchronicities converge together to provide me the learning experiences I need.
When I hold the right question, which my consciousness is now being engaged with, what happens, is form takes shape from the Quantum Soup, which I start to witness by feeling it, inside of myself. I actualise through the inquiry with all the resources necessary. That's the magic that happens all by itself.
The multidimensional landscape
In working without a specified goal intention, other that to be aligned with this natural flow, I find myself not limited. Possibility is endless. And I don't coagulate the Quantum Soup into some lumpy mess, which also means other sentient life doesn't go without (remember we are living in a mostly closed system of finite resources).
I start to have visions, intuitions and knowings of a forming multidimensional landscape - which is perceived inside of myself. But I work not to hold these too solidly. Or else I tend to manifest a lesser creation. That may be okay for the 3D reality we've been living in - humanity creates all manner of disharmony this way, from the excesses of obesity, to poverty and mass starvation. Such stark polarity - such dense duality - tends to be the cause of many, if not all, war. Some have plenty of soup, others don't, who then fight to get their share.
Are we ready yet to move beyond such limitation?
For those who are, I put it to you, there's a more evolved way of creating. It's by going within and beginning to witness what's going on as you reflect on the outer mirror you're ALREADY creating. Then to inquire: "how can this be more aligned, authentic and harmonious?" To then watch form take shape around that inquiry - including the distorted aspects of your consciousness so you can work through them. And to work toward a place, where you're doing this ALL THE TIME.
To support you in integrating conscious creation into your life...
check out Openhand's Advanced Spiritual Course Program
"Soul Retrieval" - reclaiming lost fragments of soul
I believe what you'll discover, step by step, is the flow of your soul. Which flows within the Quantum Soup. Form takes shape, and your soul sticks in the soup, creating lumps. These might be attachments in relationships for example - generating 'tightness', which you can feel as hotspots, inside yourself. In the head perhaps, tightness in the chest, the solar plexus or sacrum. These are all telltale signs. But rather than simply trying to dump them, by "dropping the hot coals" (which is only a temporary illusionists 'trick' anyway), get into the heat, feel it wash over you - where does it tighten you, where's the density? Why is it doing that? What's your attachment?
If it's in the sacrum, maybe it's attachment in relationships for example? (in the book 5GATEWAYS I provide a detailed synopsis of the attachments which cause the chakras to contract and close). The important thing, is not to simply dump or deny this pain by immediately trying to heal or cure it. Because that is also to dump the fragment of soul that 'broke off' from the soul's mainstream and created it. It's like dumping the baby with the bathwater. To truly heal, is to self-realise - to be realising of the One Self within every expression - throughout the Quantum Soup.
The way to do this, is to express the contractive pain (be it emotional, psychological, physical or karmic) until you become 'as-one with it'. In other words, you become so awesomely okay in it, that you don't need it to go away. That's when you become "The One" in it. That's when you reclaim the lost fragment of soul that created the 'hotspot'. With that, the distorted reality - the lumps in the Quantum Soup - unwind (shamans call this process "soul retrieval"; you're literally retrieving lost fragments of soul). Now you don't get caught by that obstacle again - you don't have to remanifest it from the Quantum Soup.
Authentic Reality arises from the Question, not the answer
Once you get to a point where you've removed most of these 'lumps' in the 'soup' within you, everything begins to flow more smoothly inside. Your soul creates authentic manifestations - but crucially - these arise from the question, not the answer. In other words you don't begin with the answer - the intention - you want. There is an authentic and aligned role for your soul. There is something it is meant to 'do' - actually more meant to 'be'. And there's a place where all souls naturally interrelate - it's the natural configuration of the Quantum Soup. A natural arising that, by it's own nature, considers all in it. When such universal alignment occurs - this looks and feels like nirvana. I believe its the fully mature state the Universe is coming to.
You can be a part of that harmony right now.
You can become a point source for it to unfold all around you.
When you're in this space, it feels just like heaven. How do you 'do' this?
Authentic Manifestation
- First take 'doing' out of the equation. Setting a specific intention is doing (other than to be naturally aligned and in the flow, which is more a way of being).
- Start to work moment by moment on how to be. Beingness is totally inherent in you. There's a totally natural alignment. When you find authentic beingness, this brings you into alignment with the flow of the One. Begin by asking: "How would you have me Be now?"
- From authentic beingness, you'll explore questions about reality (rather than intentions). The questions themselves will begin to manifest from the Quantum Soup, in alignment with all. Ask: "What would you have me Do now?"
- This brings groups of souls together - by the Law of Attraction - and creates wonderful, flowing synchronicity (not just to odd one or two, which happens with intention setting). Right Action simply happens and reality takes shape around you.
- In the early stages, what will get in the way, are the distortions where your soul gets stuck. No matter. Turn to face them. Work into them, then you learn to quickly release them. Ask: "What is this blockage revealing to me now?" (see this 9 step Spiritual Healing Process.
The flow unleashes once more. Authentic questions create authentic reality from the Quantum Soup with all the necessary resources and circumstances you require.
Ready to create magic!
So, are you ready to dump the limited intentions and goals, and instead, allow the natural arising of inquisitive exploration? Are you ready to feel the arising of soul, and follow it as an expression of being? Why not give it a chance and see how lovely and refreshing such surrender can be?
Once you do, you unleash flowing divine magic within you. At times it will cause blockages in the Quantum Soup - within you - felt as tightness, as 'hotspots'. No matter, this is all simply the process of self-realisation at work. Turn into them, express them, become as one with them, and then unravel them. Open the door to the soul once more. Expand out, unleash the flow. Create a magical landscape.
It's exactly what we do on our courses and retreats. If you resonate, check out our upcoming events:
Openhand Latest Courses and Retreats
Open 
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The "Quantum Dreamstate"...Creating from the Flow of the Field
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05/08/2022 Openhand Journal Update:
Wow, Avalon Rising begins today, I can hardly believe it - the culmination of Openhand's academic year. And what a year it's been, how things have grown, developed and integrated. Thanks to all you all for your kindness and support.
Quantum Manifesting @ Avalon Rising
This year's Avalon Rising Summit will focus on quantum manifesting aligned with the flow of the field, and, calling in aligned Star Beings to support our creative flow. Intriguing right!
For those not fortunate enough to be coming, I felt to elaborate and share a few insights we'll be working through. It will be crucial to understand the nature of what I call the "Quantum Dreamstate". It's based on what the shamans call the "Dreamtime" and here's what I mean by it...
The Quantum Dreamstate is to be in the quantum field, the rhythm, patterning and energy that is flowing in the surrounding space-time-continuum from which reality crystallises.
So prior to any event or circumstances landing in your life, it is preceded by the flow of the Dreamstate Quantum Energy. Whether we are conscious of it or not, actually our configuration of inner consciousness is already plugged into this. Your karma shapes the Dreamstate for example, plus any automated and unconscious programming you carry - these creative repetitive derailing patterns in your life.
What if then, you could consciously live in this Quantum Dreamstate so that you are continually a conscious creator of your life? What if you could create in alignment with your soul? Then everything would have the feeling of destiny, because everything would be clicking in around you.
The key to living in the Quantum Dreamstate is first to understand how the space-time continuum shapes from the infinite potential of pure presence. Then it is to master the art of "Transcendence". By this I mean that you are constantly equalising with any experience that you have so as not to identify with it. You have the experience but it doesn't own you. What this means is that you can become completely intimate with any experience - thus you penetrate right through it. That's how you start to access the Quantum Energy Field from which all is created - the space-time continuum.
You'll recognise this as signs and synchronicity that start to click in around you. You'll have prophetic visions of the future and get a sense of where and how the next moment is beginning to shape. You'll start to witness the patterning of interactions in your relationships - the engagements that tend to happen. It enables you to get inside the automated and programmed reactivity, to break open the programs, and then come from a more aligned creative space.
That's what I felt to encourage today - a deeper inquiry into the "Quantum Dreamspace". First and foremost it's absolutely heavenly! But it also allows you to become the master of your destiny. Do read the main article above to get a deeper insight into what I've called the "Quantum Soup" - meaning the space-time continuum...
Setting Intention, Divine Manifestation and Navigating the Quantum Soup
And here's the Openhand video on Transmutation to help you tap into this Quantum Dreamstate. We'll be applying something like it on Avalon Rising...
Bright Blessings to all
Open
Unresolution is the resolution
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One of the many things I took from the quantum reset retreat is this - the un-resolution is the resolution! I'm moving through a phase where I can see many choices / possibilities in my landscape. Some involve travelling, investing money, stepping out, being where I'm giving energy to what im already experiencing etc. It's getting me into the head or I'm trying to resolve it out with my head. It's hitting different blindspots - poverty consciousness for instance. Today after clearing out the density, a close friend send me a video of black snakes. I know for sure black snake energy is affecting the flow. I lost my debit card for the second time. Fortunately I got it this time. I think it reflects the fear of losing money, making mistakes and regretting it later. While I was contemplating this, I saw some synchronicities and signs pointing out how I'm getting into the head rather than following the intuition. Another one is excitement, I get I excited when an idea comes into the mind, a particular path or thing that I can do but when I seriously contemplate it the excitement dissipates suddenly leaving me in doubt and despair. One part of me is afraid to be in a quasi state of accepting everything and not following the challenging soul path. Another part just wants to follow the desires. The real question that I'm asking is how can I work with this unresolution, and need for answer. And it leads to the same place of sitting in it and being ok with not having answers and not trying to resolve it out. I feel Im still in the beginning phase manifesting things in the 5D without effort or intention. Yesterday while sitting in the place of unresolution, a song flowed out of me. It has it's perks. So patience . Work in progress!
The need to sit in the impossibility of your situation
In reply to Unresolution is the resolution by Vimal
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12/01/21: Journal Update: Hi Vimal - great to see you on the recent Quantum Reset Retreat. 
For me you pulled out one of the higher dimensional gems that landed right at the end - and I could feel it in the group. The need to sit in the impossibility of the global situation right now - how the "Unresolution is the Resolution". Let's expand a moment or two for all in the community.
Especially in today's world, you're going to hit these moments, either in families or society, where it seems impossible to make a choice, and this literally chews you up inside. BUT, that's the point - it's chewing you up internally. And that's why you created the impossibility! The key here is to sit in the feeling of that without needing an outcome - even though you might desperately wants to resolve it. Sit with the convolution and work to let go of the need for an outcome - just to be in that space.
Keep working with it, keep moving with it, ask, "show me!"
You'll find it will start to unravel eventually and then a pathway will reveal itself.
It requires us to find plenty of courage and conviction.
Sometimes the "Unresolution is the Resolution" indeed!
PS - for all those thinking of jumping into the Openhand work, we've got two great online courses coming up soon...
8th-12th Feb: ONLINE, THRIVE in 3D/5D (ZONES USA to INDIA)
Based on Openhand's acclaimed 5GATEWAYS work, this is our new look and feel stage 2 retreat that integrated higher 5D consciousness into daily 3D living. With an essential spiritual routemap and compass, it empowers you to create abundantly with the divine in this globally terraforming landscape.
Let's THRIVE in a new world of possibility!
8th-12th Mar: ONLINE, THRIVE in 3D/5D (ZONES EU to AUS)
Based on Openhand's acclaimed 5GATEWAYS work, this is our new look and feel stage 2 retreat that integrated higher 5D consciousness into daily 3D living. With an essential spiritual routemap and compass, it empowers you to create abundantly with the divine in this globally terraforming landscape.
Let's THRIVE in a new world of possibility!
Best wishes to all
Open
Constant surrender
In reply to The need to sit in the impossibility of your situation by Open
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Hello Open,
Thank you for the reassurance. Yes it's challenging me in every which way. It's quite a unique experience also, a different challenge to what I have experienced before. The feeling is that of stuckness, not feeling free to move. I'm asking show me all the time, which helps greatly. It gets easier to let go any need for resolution, need for answers but rather asking the question - what do I think I need which points to some attachment which is pulling on the tethering. Today I said to myself, I don't want to effort to make anything happen, I'm letting it go. Because it's not worth being in this state to acquire anything. Being in the unresolution, some choice would indeed become clear but only to close down very quickly which is quite peculiar. By then the mind had already attached to the idea. I think it's a constant surrender process. All the attachment, needs, things that I think I need to do etc are being revealed big time. Theres a fear of loosing something, opportunity, money, relationship etc. Trust! Trust that if its meant to happen, it will. I don't need to effort. But closely watching the landscape for any movement which demands attention.
Glad the kundalini breathing is working
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That sounds great Steve - I'm glad it's working for you :-)
Kundalini breathing and twin flame
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Open I had this conversation with you at the 5 Gateways retreat, I have continued applying this technique to the best of my ability, I do the kundalini and spinal breathing but I don't do this to a soul mate as for now I am single but I apply the technique to my everyday experiences, such as the feeling of a light drizzle of warm rain falling down on my face and how beautiful it felt in that moment, or maybe just the drive to work and noticing the changing of the season and a tree blooming and the majesty of the sunshine glowing on it, I do the technique and I imagine these moments in my everyday and bring that love and ah-ha moment back to the 'eighth' and my Twin Flame.
I feel this has and continues making a very real difference in my day to day life.
Steve
You guys are ace :)
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Thanks so much for the amazing words of support and advice both of you!
You have given me some great new tools to go away and practice with. It really makes all the difference having people to talk to and share ideas. Also Im glad I spoke up about the sexual energy thing. We all have it, and it is an important thing going on for so many people-it seems crazy that its not spoken about more openly.
Aspasia-I think I will now always remember your cup of tea approach to density :) Love it!
And as for attending an Openhand gathering, I would love to. Ive tried to make it a few times in the past but it wasn't possible with childcare etc. Hopefully this autumn i'll come and join in.
OK well enjoy your weekend everyone.
Lots of love! XXX
Hey lovely Faye,
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Hey lovely Faye,
Your posts I find SO interesting – an email notification popped up into my email account – so on-line again to share with you here before heading to a local Buddhist monastery!
Open says: “totally accepting things as they are without needing to change them. So 'giving love to something' is not accepting it as it is. There's a tendency to try to change it. We must truly accept it as it is in the beginning - then breathe love through it.”
I resonate a lot with this and it is so profound when it is directly experienced. I find there is a tendency to use the breath (breathing into the density) or to use love (breathe love into/through) with the often subtle intention to change it (the density), to make it go away because it is so unpleasant. That’s natural of course. There is nothing wrong with that. Hence not necessary to judge it, it happens. In recognising this we can let it go and explore a different way to use the breath and love. I have found the breath to be a powerful tool to hold my attention so as to be with the density particularly if it becomes overwhelming. So my attention rides the breath so as to be with, totally accepting towards the density. Like, hey! It’s you again density, how wonderful, let’s have a cup of tea! Ha ha!
Similarly with love. A soft, kind, loving attitude which is embracing the density, filters it and lovingly accepts it as it is. Then naturally the density will dissolve by itself.
I don’t tend to work with visualisations a lot only because of the way that I was trained. But I would love to do that more and Openhand is drawing me into it. And it looks like you are a natural with visualisations, so I am learning from you!! :)
You say “There is one more thing that I wanted to say before but felt a bit shy, but Im going to say it anyway because its a big factor in whats going on for me at the moment, and Im probably not alone, is that I have so much sexual energy charging around my body-with no where to go and I'm not entirely sure what to do with it all!”
Faye, I am with you on this! I was actually, well, it feels like that I was born with high sexual energy. I find that people - and I in the past - are shy, fearful, shameful etc etc in talking about their sexual energy. This, in my experience, is quite restricting, mentally, physically and well, spiritually.
I would like to share with you some of the things that I have been exploring so as to channel the energy. Feeling through my sexual energy (physically and mentally) and intentionally focusing my attention on moving it through dance or any kind of movement. Dance does it very well for me and movement could be yoga or pilates or a conscious session at the gym or a power walk in nature. In the past, I was into high energy movement but now I can channel into soft movement and breathing. Nature is another way. Again, feeling intentionally my sexual energy and then allowing it to move through my other senses (smell in smelling a flower, the air, the water etc; sight in looking at the colours of a leaf and the shape of a tree trunk; touch in feeling through my fingers the delicate sense of the water etc etc ). For me, this is meditation on sexual energy by connecting with nature. There are more ways and sure you will find what works for you :)
Indeed, coming into an Openhand course is profound and it makes so much difference! See you there! Or sooner :)
With much much love xx
True empowerment is accepting without needing to change
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Hi Faye - don't worry about posting plenty - consider yourself a part of the 'family'.
A few points jump right out...
- firstly when you're 'sending love out to your ex partners', do make sure you're dissolving their energy and bringing the love back inside of you, like a loop, or else you'll deplete your energy, not build it up.
- there are two stages to becoming awesomely okay with something and finding alignment: empowering yourself as the One; then working to align the energy. Empowering yourself as the One, means totally accepting things as they are without needing to change them. So 'giving love to something' is not accepting it as it is. There's a tendency to try to change it. We must truly accept it as it is in the beginning - only then breathe love through it.
- I sense at the core of the black cloud is the emptiness of presence. Let's be clear, presence is NOT love. It is pure "isness". That's who we are at the core of everything. My sense is that the ego doesn't like this presence and so forms the clouds around it. So work to completely accept without changing or needing it to go away. When you've accepted it, then breathe light through it.
- with the sexual energy, it is very close to activated kundalini in vibration. Try expressing the energy into creativity, or giving it out into nature for example. And there's nothing wrong at all with being intimate with yourself. It's a very evolving practice when done in a sensual loving way.
I think you'd greatly benefit by attending an Openhand gathering - we'll be listing the autumn events soon. See if you resonate to come along.
Sending love
Open *OK*
A bit difficult this morning
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I know Im posting a lot at the minute, because Im really working through something at the moment. I hope it's OK with you all. It's so helpful to share and get feedback, as Im sure you all must find-I guess thats what this forum if for. Anyway I did the breakthrough breathing and tried to do the sending out love to ex lovers... I just couldn't do it today. I just felt big voids in my abdomen and chest area. It was like there were several voids all different shapes, and I just felt empty and depleted-like I had given everything away and there was nothing left. So I figured I needed some help and love from the universe, so I opened up from my root chakra and let the gaia energy come up and through me. This felt wonderful for a time and seemed to replenish my consciousness probably to about 60%, but it just couldn't quite get there somehow. There was a particular blank spot though to my upper right chest and arm area. I often find this. Today more than ever before I noticed a dark black shape-like a black cloud. I tried accepting its presence, giving it love, breathing into it...What happened next is it seemed to slither, or move like lava in a lava lamp up into the top of my head! Which is where it still is. I have a funny light aching feeling in there. What do I do?? This morning I just couldn't shift it myself, an dI did try all sorts. I feel like its probably been there for a while. Its not the first time Ive felt it, but it is the most pronounced I would say.
There is one more thing that I wanted to say before but felt a bit shy, but Im going to say it anyway because its a big factor in whats going on for me at the moment, and Im probably not alone, is that I have so much sexual energy charging around my body-with no where to go and I'm not entirely sure what to do with it all! I figure there must be a way of putting it to good use. Can I use it to deal with the black cloud thing??
Any advice welcome :)
Keep digging, keep going deep
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Hi Márk - I'm glad the penny has dropped *OK*
Vimal - glad you tuned in anyway :-)
Hi Faye - the barrier around your chest sounds like the karmic source pain that created the problem in the first place. And it sounds like you're dissolving it (hence the shuddering). I love the intuitive visual way you're working with it - awesome. Keep digging, keep going deep, and sure enough, miraculous experiences will result on the other side.
Blessings to all
Open *give_rose*
Subtle ones
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I think one can also loose in the more subtle reflection like the song of a bird maybe thinking that its what creating the feeling and hence hoping for more. But if the feeling are already inside of us then there's less need to hold on to it, less fear of losing it and thereby we can see it more. It always begins in the simplest things for me.
When i first say this post i was like "oh yea another twin flame article ,i haven't had a partner yet so why bother to read it". Turns out there was a lesson waiting for me here.
Why it touched my so deeply
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Hi Open,
You wrote
"The character of the Coldplay video finds himself asleep in society, but then wakes up, whereupon the pull takes him on a journey back through the challenges of his life, crossing through the densities (where he crosses the railway lines), back toward the start, where an 'accident' separated him from his Twin Flame..."
It is not only 'the story of my life', but literally, when I was separated from a physical manifestation of my twin flame through a lethal accident years ago, I was drawn to buy this Coldplay CD. Back then, little did I know about twin flames, what I did know however was that THIS track and the video was speaking to me directly. It was like a direct message, hope in the middle of the deepest despair, that somehow this whole thing, the darkest hours of my dark night of the soul, the suffering does make sense. I was watching it, again and again, a thousand times while crying like there's no tomorrow, feeling this incredible pain slowly leaving my body. THIS video was a message from my twin flame, now I know.
So this synchronicity was a reminder again, and I felt to share it with everyone, that your Twin Flame will never leave you, she always be by your side. Having burnt away quite a lot of alchemical dross ever since, this energy is now always with me and speaking to me - sometimes 'only' as a song on the radio.
with love
Márk
Continued!
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Kim, I feel that kind of love intensity to such an extent at times, I feel like I'm going to shatter into pieces! Very helpful discussion! We best not go for a walk together ha!
True love is the absence of control
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Hi Kim,
You said...
- "When I was out walking today I was consciously doing this, opening and bringing the feelings stimulated by the outer landscape back inside of me. At one point there was a happy couple which I felt a completeness inside but it got really overwhelming, like the feeling of love was too much and I couldn't just allow it fully. I have felt this at times suppressing how much love I feel for someone."
Yes I have had similar experiences - where the love is so strong, I've felt like I was going to burst - like the profound experiences of multiple synchronicities clicking in, feeling like the whole universe is supporting you. I think the human bodymind struggles with this depth of love - it's like the energy is too strong. Especially if there's still the filters of ego - it can literally blast them apart.
I've found the best way to embody such love, when it occurs in this strength, is to breathe it down inside, to burn away any of the 'dross', progressively. It'll be immensely healing and really open you up.
It makes you feel immensely open - incredibly vulnerable - because true love is the absence of control. Hence the absence of tightness and separation.
Open *OK*
The Law of Attraction draws the perfect partner
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Hi Faye,
I totally understand that one would want to share the experiences of one's life with a partner - what a beautiful experience. However it's the 'craving companionship' with another that's the problem. The craving is essentially saying 'I can't be whole and complete by myself'. Whereupon one of two things is going to happen...
- either the soul manifests aloneness until you can feel completely okay with that
- or the ego manifests a relationship that breaks down, because it can never ultimately fulfill the hole
The way to manifest the perfect partner for you, is to first love yourself the way you would want another to love you. If you want someone to be whole and complete enough not to disempower you by trying to own your energy, then first you must become whole and complete in yourself. Then the perfect partner will effortlessly manifest, without even having to look. The Law of Attraction will simply draw you together.
Namaste
Open *OK*
Feeling too much love?
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I have a question that came up for me today and has in the past as well in regards to this. When I was out walking today I was consciously doing this, opening and bringing the feelings stimulated by the outer landscape back inside of me. At one point here was a happy couple which I felt a completeness inside but it got really overwhelming, like the feeling of love was too much and I couldn't just allow it fully. I have felt this at times suppressing how much love I feel for someone. Maybe it is because it creates a feeling of being vulnerable or exposed.. Has anyone else experienced this?
Thanks,
Kim
Thank you so much
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Open, thank you so much for taking the time to write this, and for being so understanding and thoughtful. Im going to do the practice, and try and move through this challenge. You are not kidding when you say its one of the hardest things to deal with! I know I need to do my inner work first. I do crave companionship and physical closeness with another person. I hope that by doing the hard work on the inside that the Universe will reflect back to me some love and sparkles on the outside! Its been too long! Thanks again Open :)
Losing and recovering your Twin Flame from Relationship
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When you first encounter someone who has a strong reflection of your Twin Flame, it's like being in their very presence completes you. In a way it does - because they activate the unmanifest - Twin Flame - aspect of yourself. It's very easy for the ego to get fooled into thinking that they - your partner - is the completion of you. And so you crave more and more of their presence.
What then often happens, is that the relationship gets loaded with expectation. Or else you become so close, that you cross inner boundaries which are not in the best interests of your soul - you hand over your power to them. Over time, the relationship can no longer deliver the energy of the Twin Flame, even though you're now conditioned to seeking it ever more through them. You've squeezed the juice out of the relationship and it becomes like a drug that can never fulfill. To challenge you even more, now the Twin Flame is lost and buried in the inner density, which you steadily heap more and more layers on. But when the soul is yearning, at this point, what may often happen is some kind of 'accident', so as to separate the energy of the partners, get you feeling more into the body again (like the sacrum for instance) and begin the journey back to the source, back to the Twin Flame, inside yourself.
I find this coldplay video captures the idea of it absolutely perfectly. The character of the movie finds himself asleep in society, but then wakes up, whereupon the pull takes him on a journey back through the challenges of his life, crossing through the densities (where he crosses the railway lines), back toward the start, where an 'accident' separated him from his Twin Flame...
So the question is, how do you recover this aspect of yourself?
Firstly let me ask you this rhetorical question: when you love someone, where is the love experienced?
Of course the love is experienced inside of you. That means the love is inside of you - NOT inside of them. That means it is YOUR love. That means it is SELF love - love of the One Self, but experienced inside of you. That means it is yours. It was, and is, always there, and can be activated ultimately at will - you've just chosen to lose it in the illusion of someone else.
Next begin with the Breakthrough Breathing Meditation (or something like it). Once you've mastered the breathing to a degree, and can attune to the soul inside, picture the image of the person to whom you lost your energy, or any other person that activates that loving passion within. Now breathe the energy out into the vision, but most importantly, continue the loop of energy back toward and inside of yourself. You're breathing a 'kundalini' loop of energy out and back in.
If that partner no longer becomes accessible to you as a reflection of the Twin Flame energy (because you've separated), then watch the image of them progressively disappear - like sunshine through mist - as you take the energy back inside of yourself. Feel the energy, as much as you can, whole and complete inside of you. Now take yourself out and look for manifestations of it in the field around you - a bird, a flower, the breeze on your face, the sun shining through trees, or else the image - the dream - of another person, on a magazine, a billboard or in a movie, and yet all the while, returning the energy back inside yourself.
As you master this application of kundalini, you become less and less attached to needing your Twin Flame to appear in a particular way. Then suddenly a miracle happens:
- You discover your Twin Flame is around you, everywhere, in everything that you do.
You are never depleted, but always filled up.
Wowzers
In reply to Losing and recovering your Twin Flame from Relationship by Open
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I just wanted to say-I got up really early and did the practice-the breakthrough breathing followed by the visualisations of my love and passion flowing out to my ex and ex's, then mirroring it back. Crikey-it is a powerful one! Once I got going with it it felt like it became a self sustaining loop that just kept coming. I noticed a couple of things-that I somehow kept putting up a faint but effective barrier around my chest / heart area. I just kept breathing into it to try and dissolve it. At one point my body did a massive shudder and that seemed to shift it... And the other thing I noticed was that once I felt filled up by all my reflected power and love, that I had a sense of insecurity that it might leak out again. Not sure how to resolve that one, except that Im going to get up every morning for this week, and do this same practice. The final thing that was interesting was that all the men I had lost my energy to were there in my imagination. It was like they were there in a semi circle around my field from left to right. I could see the different qualities that attracted me -and the reflection of the truest aspects of me there in each one. Interestingly to my right hand side, there were a couple of presences there, with no faces, but I could feel them there-just white bright spaces. Its funny-it felt like these presences were in my future. I could still project and reflect from them too. Thanks so much for the heads up on this practice. It is a new one to me and definitely seemed to do something important!
Insight into how the causal body shapes our physical lives
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- "This happened because I had an unsightly bunion on my foot, and in my twenties, I was preoccupied with how my body looked, It actually functioned fine!! So I literally kind of shot myself in the foot by having the operation mainly out of vanity. I learned the hard way that i need to love my feet and my body even if they do not look perfect-they were and still are."
- What might "loving oneself" really mean?
Relationships
In reply to Insight into how the causal body shapes our physical lives by Open
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Hi Open,
You asked that question about my relationships and I read it at quite a particularly profound moment, If pain is where the spirit gets in then my relationships must have been created for the purpose of cracking me right open. There's been one big significant relationship in my life. The father of my child. I knew him for a long time as friends, before we got together, but when we did become a couple it ended up being a very traumatic relationship for us both. It ended nearly 18 months ago. We were both the love of each others lives for a time, but we opened up each others deepest insecurities. For me it ended in abandonment, that triggered my spiritual wake up call. My wake up call began a year or so before the relationship officially ended. It's a beautiful wonderful journey-full of heartache and joy and everything in between. It is lonely at times, but I wouldn't change it for the world. I miss him terribly at times. Sometime I think Im over him, and then I see him again when he visits our daughter-who is the most perfect wonderful little person-we share the wander of her together but from a respectful distance as we are no longer together and he's with someone else. The thing is I have experienced some profound moments of oneness with him. We both did-we are both mountaineers, and experienced some moments on top of mountains that were beyond time and space.
I know the only way forwards is to learn from this pain, to sink into it etc. I feel like we have known each other from way beyond this lifetime, and that maybe he was also built into my blueprint for some other reason. I have worked so hard on myself and will continue to do so... It's a hard heartbreak to work through. I will keep persevering through-and accepting. Im writing this at a time when Im feeling it quite strongly. It often doesn't feel quite so bad as it does today. Bad is a funny word to use. Its a double edged sword. Feeling so heartbroken also helps me feel closer to spirit / the big mystery somehow as well. More alive. Which is maybe what you mean above when you say "We're caused to confront and feel into the pain, to let go and transcend it. Thus the fragments of soul reintegrate and the karma dissolves.". I will keep trying. It seems to last forever! Ive been doing this my whole life in one form or another... this is the biggest heartbreak to date, but there have been a whole string of them. I have big heart. After all this it (my heart) still hasn't become hard... I am learning to be discerning, but I can still love with everything Ive got. I feel pain but I feel joy too. A pretty flower, or a news report can make me cry. A Coldplay song just made me bawl my eyes out! Any insights are welcome. I would love to find a way out of the heartbreak cycle, but I understand maybe this is happening for reason right now. Faye
Contemplation
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Heyas all!
This concept, this thought-form, this way of being is exactly what the universe (my universe?! or is it just the universe?!!!) has been trying to show me for so long now and all I have been doing is just keeping my head down trying as hard as I apparently can to just not see it because I did not or could not fathom/comprehend what was happening all my life. I was pretty sure the universe at large thought I was it's flippin chew toy or something.
But..When the universe call's you up and say's look here, and here and here. Eventually one such as I that is extremely resistant and requires proof beyond a reasonable doubt just sits down, sighs and say's well ok then! The most humbling, profound and exquisite things just happen.
If the universe can send my Mother at 9 months pregnant to go hiking in Hell's Canyon, Oregon just so she can look down because the baby girl inside her womb started moving around so much which in turn causes her to find a ring on the ground and later on down the road give it to her daughter to remind her she is loved.
The universe aligned itself just to save my life on more than one occasion. I was in a car wreck as a child, I went out the windshield onto the hood of the car and then fell off onto the pavement in a bloody mess. Two cars ahead of ours was an Ambulance and two cars behind us was a local news reporter. I to this day still have the news clipping from it.
I have so many other stories like this, some I've already shared here. Like a smoke dragon photo ;)
Recently I was just walking in the park that's in front of my home. I had picked up a rock from a little creek bed here and thought to myself it sure would be cool if I could find some obsidian. That afternoon my daughter told me about a gem and mineral show set to happen in the coming week. Well, I got my obsidian and discovered a new kind I did not know about which sent me on a path of oooh, there is so much more than just black obsidian! How cool is that.
The rock that I picked up just absolutely sent my life into a cascade of the universe saying to me, let me just show you how much of a chew toy you are NOT. Let me just show you and remind you how it really and truly is.
The universe does provide for everyone, you don't even have to do a thing for it to do so, it just does it. How absolutely beautifully profound is that?!
So I guess my point here is if the universe has done so many things for me, it does and will always do so for everyone else. You don't even have to have faith in it because it has faith in each and every one of you.
This doesn't mean I'm not still absolutely astounded or confused or befuddled in any current moment, but I can say right here and right now.. I am happily humbled in the way it has and will provide for me.
Wyndè
Faye, I have a sacroiliac
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Faye, I have a sacroiliac issue (it is always there – at times it flares up when I am in emotionally challenging spaces, mostly to do with grief) and I had a very interesting experience over a year ago that I think reflects what Open says and Charlie alludes to. I was in a week-long teacher training course module that - by its nature - required inner work. Also, events happened at the workshop that challenged me a lot. Throughout the week I was negotiating between a degree of silent and non-silent reactivity, feeling through the density etc, inquiry, expression through movement, heartfelt sharing and of course connection with nature. The more I was ‘working through’ like this the lighter I felt and by the end of the week I noticed that there was no pain or discomfort on my sacroiliac muscles. Totally gone! Of course, I find that, at least in my case, this needs revisiting and reworking through as deeper conditioning arises - well endlessly, even after - apparently - 'full awakening' I hear from others!
much love x
Your pain is the place where the light enters
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Hi Faye,
Greetings - nice to see you :-)
You asked...
- "I know this (the sacrum) is a 3D issue! Is this likely to have ay effect on my spiritual evolution?
Actually it's quite the reverse. Evolution is about learning to transcend the lower vehicles, and usually problems in the physical/emotional bodies are the manifestations of some karmic incongruency in the causal body - in the fourth density. The causal body provides the blueprint for the lower ones.
So when we have a physical/emotional impairment, what it actually does is shine the light on those areas where we most need to work with acceptance - to work with awareness into the issue.
Your pain is the place where the light enters.
Open *OK*
Thanks Aspasia and Open - and Causal Body
In reply to Your pain is the place where the light enters by Open
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Open and Aspasia, Thanks very much for your replies. I love your sentence-your pain is where the light enters :) A paradox, and a beautiful one that gives a lot of comfort. And Aspasia, it's lovely to see you and read your words as always! I will do as you did. Keep sinking into, exploring and working through and see what comes up.
Can I ask please, if you could explain a little more about the 4th dimension, or causal body-or direct me somewhere where I can find out more. I don't know much about this. Im envisaging its a blueprint for my physical body passed down from previous lives maybe? Not sure. To give you a little more insight-I have necrosis of the bone in my foot. This happened because I had an unsightly bunion on my foot, and in my twenties, I was preoccupied with how my body looked, It actually functioned fine!! So I literally kind of shot myself in the foot by having the operation mainly out of vanity. I learned the hard way that i need to love my feet and my body even if they do not look perfect-they were and still are. I don't know how I injured my sacrum. So I know there is most likely an awful lot more going on under the surface of this story... I don't know what, but the fact its been flaring up indicates to me that its time to start unraveling it maybe. Any info on the causal body would be appreciated, though I know that the most important thing is to sink into the pain and emotions that arise. Im sure I'll be able to work through it. It's now becoming less stressful/painful and more interesting! Like a treasure hunt!
Thanks and much love,
Faye
Hi Faye
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You said;( I found out last week that I have a compressed sacrum bone-along with another permanent bone injury to my foot-resulting in numerous other physical problems now beginning to manifest. I know this is a 3D issue! Is this likely to have ay effect on my spiritual evolution?)I think you have answered your own question here with, I know this is a 3D issue.You see once we transcend from this 3D World we no longer need this body. I have never ask myself questions about my physical conditions here in this vessel's 3D world. I have 5 disk in the neck that I have the nerves killed by lazer ever year or so, 3 gone in the lower back and one leg shorter than the other by 2 inches. I could go on but I think you get the point.(lol) Spiritual evolution I believe is for everyone; the weak, strong, sick, health, addicts, non addicts, believers, non believers, again you get the picture.
I will tell you this though, Openhand is a great place to ask these questions. Everybody's path is unique. I think the one thing we have in common here is that we all feel that there is more to what are eyes tell us about this 3D world we are living in. Although our path may take different routes, they all lead back to the Source.
To me, we all have the answers to everything we need but sometimes need a little help from the right person or people to find it. I hope this helps. I am not great with words but felt a need to reply to you.I am quite sure you well get a lot more help now that you have found Opanhand.
Much love,
Charlie
*yes3*
Thank you Charlie
In reply to Hi Faye by Charlie
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Thanks so much for your kind words. My physical issues are minor compared to what many people have to deal with-including yourself by the sounds of things. It is giving me plenty of opportunity for working out density however! I got pretty scared when I realised I most likely now have a permanent health issue, and will most likely have to deal with chronic pain for the foreseeable. Its not terribly bad at the moment, but Im only young. Anyway Im so glad I have my toolbox now for dealing with issues on a mental level. Its so wonderful to be able to see everything in my life as an opportunity for personal growth. It really does change everything! The other thing that really changes everything is feeling love and support from people like you Charlie and others in this community. To know we are not alone in our struggles no matter what they may be makes the journey so much more bearable. Love to you all :) XXXXX
Sacrum
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Hi There, I have a question. I found out last week that I have a compressed sacrum bone-along with another permanent bone injury to my foot-resulting in numerous other physical problems now beginning to manifest. I know this is a 3D issue! Is this likely to have ay effect on my spiritual evolution? I ask this as I saw your comment in the article above that emotional blockages in the sacrum area... Wandering how / if this could relate to my physical ailments. Faye
Further down the rabbit hole
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As I've gone deeper into what I was projecting re my judgment of David Bowie having sex with an underage teenage girl, I recently had an aha moment of what I was denying/judging about myself. And that was around the question you posed, Open, asking if there is any difference between the rape of an animal and the rape of a human. I admit that when you posed this question, I was shocked. I recoiled as in asking, "How can you POSSIBLY compare the two?" However, I held an open space to explore further. This past week I was drawn to watch the new documentary "Unity" which I recently posted on the Openhand forum. I felt physically sick watching it and cried throughout. The pain I felt was excruciating. Excruciating enough to break through my conditioning and feel the truth of what you said: There is no difference between raping an animal and raping a human. Hence, the title of the documentary, "Unity." We are, indeed, One. I could feel this.
Over the holiday season, I decided to eat fish on a few occasions. I was feeling totally fed up denying myself foods I had enjoyed eating before I transitioned to becoming vegan these past few years. I became obsessed with eating fish 'n chips. And so I did. But I couldn't accept my feelings and at some level judged myself as weak, inhumane, lacking resolve and discipline. So I projected those feelings outwards re my reaction to Bowie. While watching "Unity", I was horrified by the scenes which show people eating fish while they're still alive. I could feel the pain of the fish so acutely. Now I feel truly aligned with compassionate, vegan eating.
In relation to all of this, the outer mirror is inviting me to go deeper into the difference between judgment and discernment. In other words, embracing more fully non-judgmental discernment. I'm feeling into the various ways I respond to living in this effed up matrix full of injustice, violence, and exploitation. I escape through a variety of distractions to numb the pain. I also feel the allurement of wrapping myself up in a false bubble of love and light, ignoring the outer mirror. And I indulge in separating myself from all that is heartbreaking by absolving myself of collective and individual responsibility through finger pointing. I'm beginning to feel into how to witness and feel the pain without judging it and without turning a blind eye to it. Nothing is out there. Everything is in here. I have a ways to go with this.
Thank you for the safe and loving space to explore and unwind.
With Love,
Catherine
Deeper still...
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Erica,
Thank you for the rays of sunshine!
Open,
Thank you for the clarity. Very helpful.
It's time to book another coaching session. I recognize I need help in going deeper still.
x Catherine
Witnessing the rays helps expression take off!
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Working deep within
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Hi Catherine,
You asked with regards working through distortions...
- does one hold back, feel into the tightness, release, and express the higher truth or does one express the distortion as a step to realizing and expressing the higher truth? My sense is that there is no hard and fast rule to this and that either might be called for depending on the circumstances.
I believe it's really important not to stifle the feeling and repress it. I see this goes on so much - it's like people have been trained not to express themselves fully - especially the negative feelings, when you don't feel so good.
But there will be times when this is not appropriate - when others wouldn't understand. That's where inner containment of the feelings is important. But only for so long as you can find your own space to work with it. Of course I'm not advocating long time suppression.
It's also important to really get to know the energy you're working with. If you just blow your top as soon as you feel something, the risk is you actually distract from going deeper - the expression can become a distraction. Like an emotional 'fizz'.
- Be aware if you're simply projecting outwards. I think this is what happened in the Bowie exploration. I'd say the attention has to be focused on the inner, but allowing that to bubble up and release. Remember, it's never about anyone out there. They may be the catalyst, but they're your own feelings you're dealing with.
If there's the tendency to judge another, always but always it's because there's something inside that you're judging or denying about yourself. If there's a tendency to angry with others, you're really getting angry about that repressed aspect in you. Or else you'd just happily witness and accept what's going on in the outer.
As you get more skilled at working deep into the layers of inner consciousness, you become much more able to work with it without too much external expression or reaction. This is pretty advanced.
In the enlightened state, you're constantly processing this way - constantly opening out through compressions in the field, inside yourself. You're constantly balancing the emotional playing field.
I trust this brings a little light to how you're working.
Open
Quantum Soup recipe/equation
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Fantastic exploration Open.
Trinity your gentle loving response warms my heart.
Catherine... Thank you for finding words for that internal conflict as I have felt that as well. For me it occurs when I zoom in to 3d and a more primitive (reptilian) emotionally charged response is expressed when I am identifying with the larger coagulated bits in the Quantum soup. Often it's when I would chose to feel offended, hurt, or angry within a situation. Back to the battle... Ray1. While it's effective in that moment the ripples sent out then back in feel disruptive to my soul. Its just a short term fix. It's definitely a cycle I had to break. That's where the softening Ray2 comes in or Ray4 the diplomat. It feels that once I allow that initial response to ripple through me it breaks down the coagulated bits that become gelatinous where I then did not identify with. Zooming out and seeing it from a cosmic or soul perspective allows soul to flow through where humor of it all brings me to a more open place. Then I can see the situation with more clarity Ray5 shines with universal truths as I become aware of the co creation occurring. and thus find the aspect of my soul that was being concealed within the Quantum soup. For quite awhile I was just the spoon stirring it all up, identifying, relating or being a master at rationalizing intellectually.
I would get a taste of Ray 7 when the synchronic experiences illuminated. So divine... Then I allowed the initial energetic response to spike in moments. It happened over and over going through this process and each time I would accelerate through it faster until I was able to just feel it all. No expectation no intention more aware with attention. Why would I allow anything less became an illuminating question.. Ray 6 shining and reflecting with inspiration to allow light to shine out.
Divine forgiveness as I see this 3d world as a playground for souls. Here to learn, to grow, to experience the restraints of the physicality which all are predisposed to in this human form. It's all part of the Quantum soup recipe/ equation.
To be or not to be...
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Open,
You said:
"To truly heal, is to self-realise - to be realising of the One Self within every expression - throughout the Quantum Soup.
The way to do this, is to express the contractive pain (be it emotional, psychological, physical or karmic) until you become 'as-one with it'. In other words, you become so awesomely okay in it, that you don't need it to go away. That's when you become "The One" in it. That's when you reclaim the lost fragment of soul that created the 'hotspot' and with that, the distorted reality - the lumps in the Quantum Soup - unwind (shamans call this process "soul retrieval" - you're literally retrieving lost fragments of soul)."
I had the sense recently that I was caught up in expressing a distortion, but I didn't check myself and hold back. It felt like, "I gotta be me," as the song goes, no matter what, even it meant that I was unpopular and going against the majority. In that sense, it felt like I was accepting myself even though I knew at some level that I was off kilter. It felt okay to be ornery and pissed off. In the process of expressing that to others, I was able to let it go and find and express a higher truth. Here's the thing that confuses me, though. When I read some of the articles and comments on the Openhand forum including this article, I feel confused about the self-realization/9-step process i.e. does one hold back, feel into the tightness, release, and express the higher truth or does one express the distortion as a step to realizing and expressing the higher truth? My sense is that there is no hard and fast rule to this and that either might be called for depending on the circumstances. I get that to become aligned with the divine flow, one must become one with the distortion to let it go. It's been my experience this past while that when I express the distortion, it takes me deeper into it, into my feelings, into my pain, and that it's a gradual process of fully accepting the pain and distortion and letting it go. At other times, I'm able to keep to myself, aware that I'm caught up in some messy emotions, and need to find a quiet space to go inwards. I'm not always able to do this, however. So I'm feeling a bit confused. For a good part of my life, I wouldn't express because I felt that I wasn't being "spiritual" enough. I somehow felt that I would magically reach a place of higher consciousness that I could express more lovingly from if I prayed enough and worked hard to become a "better" person. That so did not work. Thank you for this wonderful article, Open. Any further insights you or anyone else can provide would be most appreciated.
x Catherine
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