Could you help me with something if possible?

Often I feel that there is a great expansive pool of 'aloneness'...that kind of looms somewhere around me, recently I have made some major changes in my life, I feel I am confronting things that I previously was afraid to confront.

So I feel like I am following the path of my soul yet when this pool of aloneness makes itself known, I am so afraid that I don't won't to go into it. I feel as though I may fall into it and disappear forever or be completely obliterated by it. So I dip in and jump back out, yet without the courage to immerse myself fully.

What is this feeling of total, complete and utter aloneness?

Thanks

Gwen