Uh, I've been robbed
I was robbed. Someone broke into my apartment neatly using some kind of wire and hook through the mail box to open the lock when I was away. I didn’t have much jewellery, some necklaces and bracelets, some rings, one which had belonged to my mother and my old wedding ring etc. - so they all are gone now. First I felt the shock, then all kind of fears, what if they come back and so on. Didn’t sleep much that night.
Then began the hard thinking, why? Why me? Was it some kind of karma? The distress was awful, why now while I’ve been really SO happy and full of light and making progress in energy work and keeping my mind in positive tracks. Why now? I meditated and recalled similar incidents, when life had been quite ordinary, peaceful and actually quite good and then suddenly something comes from Outside and everything falls into a deep ravine and void, into something black and odd. Something happens which is out of my control and shakes me out of my skin. Usually these incidents have been with near and dear, incidents with children, in marriage and with my own parents.
I realised that I have been carrying this fear of OUTSIDE force which can create pain in me. That something or someone outside of me make me suffer, especially mentally (physical pain is nothing compared to psychic pain). I realised that I just don’t want to feel that fear anymore at all. I’m fed up with that fear totally! That somehow the only way for me to cope is that I must integrate everything that happens in my life as an result of my inside force, that I’m the reason, I’m in charge, I take the responsibility. Somehow I have lured those incidents into my life which shake me totally out of balance although they appear to be happen out of the blue. I meditated through all these incidents and made peace with them.
Actually I really am sorry for the thief, I´m sorry that he got this nasty role in my life story and I mentally asked forgiveness from the bottom of my heart and send love to him.
I am stronger now, I’m not going to be victim of anything anymore, things happen, sad thefts, stupid accidents, near and dear can do things that hurt me, but somehow I am the one who is responsible. Nothing comes from “outside”, there is always a reason behind why it is in my life, and I don’t have to know it, but I have to make peace with it. To have peace in me with everything, I need to be free. Something good comes from everything. Also from this theft.
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Violation
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Hi Armi,
This exploration also helped me to put some pieces of puzzle inside of myself as well. I believe we all are being violated to varying degrees every single moment. What does it mean to have someones thoughts and ideas inside your head all the time. For me it feels like I don't have any space for mine to come through. I cant recognize what is mine what is theirs. Tough as it is it also provides enormous opportunity as you recognize. Am i violating any boundaries by coming here with my thoughts and ideas? I'm not sure. But I know that the true feelings is of yearning to connect more and maybe help each other in the process. So maybe the matrix inside me ultimately also wants to connect. Its just its getting distorted with an unseen agenda. When I see the truth and see myself in them I feel compassion for the other being and hence can let go of that part which was holding me on to it.
Vimal <3
Thank You
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Thanks, yeah, the violation is the key-word, I understand it now. The shock had to be a bigger one to get me noticing the old wound from my childhood and from previous lives. It was there lurking under… And I think that I will be stronger now the handle the future's new "Shock-waves": Okey, please, I'm here...
Have a great week, and Be So Blessed dear Open
Armi
Why does it happen to me?
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Hi Armi,
Firstly to say, I feel for you, I know these kinds of things can be deeply challenging
The first thing to explore when anything like this happen is, "Why me?" "Why did this happen?"
To understand we need to first expand out of the confines of identity where "things are being done to me". We need to have a basic understanding of how the soul creates: it does so through polarity. Meaning, it draws to itself, like a magnet, exactly the circumstances that reflect and amplify our inner contraction about something. Like "being violated" for example. The crucial point to realise, is that such events will activate tightness and resistance internally, either physically, emotionally, mentally or karmically. Why did you create it? So as to explose that tightness that you may work into it.
I know you get this Armi, by what you shared here, which is wonderful...
I’m fed up with that fear totally! That somehow the only way for me to cope is that I must integrate everything that happens in my life as an result of my inside force, that I’m the reason, I’m in charge, I take the responsibility. Somehow I have lured those incidents into my life which shake me totally out of balance although they appear to be happen out of the blue. I meditated through all these incidents and made peace with them.
That's it - brilliant! When you make this commitment though, bear in mind what you're saying to the Universe. Effectively... "bring it on!" And so it will. And we'll have many layers to work through, so we'll create many similar circumstances to expose those other inner layers. It's just a case of keep working through, letting go and expanding out the other side.
My encouragment is to explore into the feeling of "violation". What does it mean to you to be violated?
Feel into any contraction of that.
Essentially the Universe is always moving through you, and you can't stop that. I'd say this is a mirror of that truth. It's about allowing everything to flow.
But if there's contraction around that, you still have to feel into the pain of it, to eventually expand out the other side.
There with you
Open
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