Dear Tonya,

You touched something really important here. We are true storytellers, aren’t we? We communicate with each other and deepen our understanding of the world through narratives. We put things in context; evaluate the environment and our place in it, using this handy approach. But then, sometimes, a story just grows on us and there might be a desire to hold on to it. You stated it so well:

It's kind of important to be willing to let go of the story - our own and others' - to truly walk this path, isn't it? However compelling, however beautiful, it's just a story. And the more we attach to it, the more we hold to it, rather than letting something crumble away that is given to crumble away, then to that degree we limit our own path, our own sovereignty.

I just sat with what you said… The storylines feel somewhat comforting, especially the ones with the beginning-middle-(happy)end. They explain things, make sense of the vast experience, give needed closure, help file things away under a predefined categories. They also have the power to encapsulate one in a version of the experience. I think we all hold on to one or two really “good ones” that can be pulled out to mask the discomfort, reinforce identity, provide a bypass into a more tolerable reality. Don’t we? ;-)

I find the strongly spiritually charged stories might be tricky to let go, especially if they bring out a manic energy. Glorification of past lives and excessive spiritualization of the lived experience can throw one in a dissociation trap. Dissociation from what? From the truth, I guess? So, what does it mean then to be truthful? There is surely a fear connected to that, yep... Feels like a childhood conditioning. A fear of not being able to control the environment.

I wondered what part of me needs to encapsulate the reality with a story? Seems it is the same part as the one that creates it: the mind. The new paradigm can not be the product of the mind alone then. Perhaps it would be born in the heart, anchored in the body and somewhat understood by the mind?

So, these are just few loose thoughts on that. I feel I’d like to sit with this a bit more… perhaps even hold some of the stories a bit lighter, take a look at them closely, and maybe let them flutter away, even if for a moment.

The visual cortex just kicked in and I’m seeing many colorful butterflies around me, ready to fly. Have you ever seen a group of butterflies waking up in the morning? Physiologically they can’t move when it’s too cold, so they just sit there in clusters on branches and leaves with their wings stretched out, gathering the sun light. Then, they stir a bit, opening and closing their wings…. And the first one takes off. It doesn’t just fly away, but circles around the sleeping ones and touches them with its wings. They eventually all wake up and take off in the search of the sweetest flower. The flower brings me back to the idea of truth. I like this analogy.

Thank you,

Margaret